Disappointment

It is common knowledge that students cheat here....a lot.  However, I finally caught four of my students cheating on a test in my class.  It crushed me.  I took it so personally.  I try so hard to encourage honesty and integrity in my classes.  I am always on time, never miss class, and am always prepared.  I do the best I can to make class enjoyable by using interesting topics and organizing activities to relieve some of the boredom that comes with a composition class.  I never test them over material we do not cover (and re-cover) in class.  To work so hard to provide my students with a class they can enjoy and learn from, just to have them repay me and themselves with dishonesty is crushing and deeply disheartening.  The worst part is that I am now seen as some sort of "irrational and rigid foreigner" because I not only expect them not to cheat but because I punish them when they do it. I am starting to doubt my own sanity in this place.......